Intimidation at the gym (aka gym-timidation) is all too real. If I had a dollar for every time someone told me that they were nervous to go to the gym because they were afraid of people judging them, I could probably quit coaching and teaching altogether and buy a beach house in Maui. If you feel that way too, I want you to know that you’re not alone. Most of my personal training clients start working with me specifically because they either wouldn’t know what to do or don’t feel confident enough to go to the gym on their own.

Yet.

The key word there is yet. My goal with everyone I work with is to teach them what they need to know so that they feel confident enough to not need me forever. But often times, it’s about more than just knowing what you’re doing.

Confession: Even as a fitness professional, I still get nervous in certain gym environments.

I get anxious when I’m going into a new space too. I prefer to work out during off hours. When I see certain people around at the gym that I know I don’t wanna talk to I put in my headphones and avoid eye contact at all costs. I love strength training, but it took me almost a year to build up the confidence to do barbell movements at the gym by myself when I wasn’t working out with another trainer or friend.

Yes, even I get a little self-conscious at the gym sometimes. And  I know that those struggles can be 10x worse for those of you who might not feel like you quite “belong” at the gym. If that’s you, I want to validate your feelings for a moment. Traditional fitness marketing features mostly certain types of bodies. Young, white, cisgender, able-bodied, thin, visible muscle definition, almost always shirtless and glistening with sweat. There’s nothing wrong with this type of person. For all I know that could be you. But when it’s all you see, it’s easy to feel like you have to look like that to be welcome at the gym. Add a few of those overused #fitspo quotes and that one pushy trainer who fat-shames new members into buying sessions, and it’s no wonder gym-timidation is a thing.

The good news is, it really is possible to get over those feelings of gym-timidation and feel more confident when you work out. Here are some ways to get started.

1. FIND A WELCOMING SPACE

Treat finding a gym like you would a job interview. Not all fitness spaces are created equal. When you’re seeking a new gym, class, instructor, or trainer, ask for what you want. Some things to look out for: are there people like you who go there/work there? What are they doing to make their space inclusive and accessible? Do they have a good sense of community? What’s the overall vibe like? If you want someone who “gets it” I highly recommend checking out Body Positive Fitness Alliance and Superfit Hero‘s fitness finders–if there’s nobody in your area, many of us do online coaching too!

2. REMEMBER That everyone was once a beginner

Though some of us might have some sort of previous athletic experience or natural ability, nobody was born with a kettlebell in their hand. Everyone was a beginner at some point. Allow yourself to embrace your beginner-ness too. It’s ok to not know. To ask questions. Ask for help if you need it. To figure it out as you go.

3. ASK A PROFESSIONAL

I promise we don’t mind. I used to work at a gym that required trainers to work a floor shift. Folding towels and wiping down machines was borrrrring. It literally made my whole shift to have someone ask me how to use a piece of equipment or how to work a certain muscle group. I started working in the fitness industry because I wanted to share my love of movement with others. I’d like to think that most fitness professionals feel the same.

4. Hire A professional!

If it’s in your budget, a few (or many!) sessions with a personal trainer can go a long way, especially if you feel like you don’t know what to do at the gym. The right trainer will teach you whatever it is that you want to learn, answer all your questions, and  help you deal with some of those mindset roadblocks too. 1:1 too expensive right now? Hit up your favorite group fitness instructor after class. I, for one, love connecting with my students, and feel like any other decent human would too!

5. HAVE A PLAN

Once you start to get familiar with what to do, think about what you’d like to do before you go in. If you’ve ever had a trainer write a program for you, you can follow some variation of that. Or you can just be a little more intuitive and decide to do what sounds good on any given day. Make a mental note of what you might like to work on, or literally make some notes on paper or in your phone. (Side note: it’s ok to to deviate from the plan if you decide you aren’t feelin’ it!)

6. Buddy UP

There’s absolutely strength in numbers. Plan to go to the gym or try a new class with a friend. Bonus points if that friend is a little more experienced and can show you around. This is also great if you feel you need some external accountability to get there.

7. Wear what makes you comfortable

I don’t know about you, but when I’m wearing an outfit that feels like “me”, I’m a little more confident in any environment, but especially the gym. Make sure you have some workout clothes that fit well. Those pants that don’t stay up, and that weird itchy sports bra won’t work. Wear colors you like. Comfy shoes. Wear no makeup or all the makeup. Literally whatever makes you the most comfortable.

8. Make a sweet playlist

Sweet jams are key. Music has so much power to boost your mood and helps you tune out the world (and your own mind). Make a playlist of all your favorite songs that make you feel energized and happy and confident and fun! Then put on your headphones and do your thing. If you’re like me and don’t always love talking to others while you’re working out, headphones are a great buffer too.

9. Go during off hours

Or during busy times. Or whenever your favorite people are there. It all depends on what you like. Try going at a variety of times, and you’ll notice that the gym feels very different. Some people feed of the energy of others at the gym. Others prefer to have the space to themselves. Figure out what you like best, then aim to make it part of your routine.

10. Stop Telling Yourself Stories

I’ve had so many people tell me that they feel like others are “staring at them” and “silently judging” them at the gym. While there is a slim chance that this is true, there are also plenty of other reasons that someone might be looking your way. Instead of making up stories about what others are thinking of you, consider one of these reasons: Maybe they really like your shirt. Or they’re waiting to use the equipment when you’re done. Maybe they aren’t sure how to use a piece of equipment and are trying to learn by watching you. Or they think you look like their old roomate’s cousin that they met one time, and trying to figure out if they should say hi. You’ll never know. And it doesn’t matter. What others think of you is none of your business. 😉

11. be the kind of person you want to see

For some of us this can be as simple as showing up. Especially if you don’t look like a fitness model. By being present in the space and showing up as your authentic self, you give others permission to do the same. Know good gym etiquette and use it. Re-rack your weights. Wipe down your machines. Put away your equipment. Be aware of other people who might like to use it, especially during busy times. Be kind and helpful to others you might encounter. Don’t comment on other people’s bodies. Leave judgement at the door.

F.E.A.R=Feeling Excited And Ready.

Yes, I’m a fan of cheesy acronyms. But I hope that’s how you’re feeling now. Use these tools to help you overcome gym-timidation, and revisit them as often as you need. I also recognize that I don’t have all the answers. My personal experience comes from a very privileged place, simply based on how I look and what I’m able to do. If you want to learn more about gym-timidation from a different perspective, check out this article by plus-sized athlete, Ragen Chastain. It provides a helpful look at how we as gym-goers, fitness professionals, and people of all shapes and sizes can help make the gym a better place for everyone.

Wanna get better at push-ups? Whether you’re trying to get your first one without using your knees, training to beat the entire patriarchy in a push-up contest, or just create better memories around push-ups than 5th grade gym class gave you, this program will help get you there.